Madhu Jain, 57 years, was murdered by a man in the guise of a priest at Lake Town, Kolkata!
Two retired college teachers in Kolkata, 78 years and 75 years, respectively, were beaten to death in Paikpara!
78-year-old Kamala Das was killed by a 15-year-old former help!
Ranjit Chatterjee was killed by a sweeper of 15 years!

These and many more such horror stories bring to the forefront the vulnerability of the aged and elderly living alone.
The most recent case of a 75-years-old lady found dead in her Jodhpur Park flat has hit home the fear and the lonely battle that many aged are fighting in their fight to live a life!

Staying alone encompasses a feeling of helplessness and hopelessness.

Why so lonely?

The growing sense of identity of independence among the elderly and their consequent rigidity can be the primary reason. With medical science improving, the geriatric issues and lengthening of life spans are on a positive road. Modern-age living and the fact of space crunch advocate nuclear families.

Women empowerment has also led to greater career options and more women are moving out of the home for long periods (women were mainly considered caregivers in the earlier times).

Thus, staying alone by the aged singly or as a couple can either be their preferred choice or a compulsion.
There is no doubt that in both scenarios, there are security issues as well as excruciating lonesomeness, which hits the elderly from time to time.
It also means a reorientation of ideas on the part of the elderly (primarily) and that of the family members.

Staying alone: a preferred choice

• Living by yourself is a statement of independence and freedom. One has the freedom to choose how to live, what to wear, where and when to go, and so on. Of course, this presupposes a certain degree of financial security that allows one to live free from worry about money issues.
• One has a sense of responsibility and a right to taking one’s own decisions right or wrong, allowing a sense of dignity and overall a feel-good factor.
• Living alone keeps one occupied, handling day-to-day problems hence one remains in tune with everyday living helping one to nurture one’s self-esteem.

Staying alone: a compulsion

• The first and foremost problem of staying alone can be depression.
• Fear stalks and stokes the mind, everything can get magnified.
• Anxiety and suspicion haunt the mind.
• One can be subject to careless and rude behavior, or even threats and blackmail.
• Misery and fear of safety and security can completely wreak havoc on the mind and heart. Living becomes a time pass. A tragedy beyond words.

Many today are opting for old age retirement homes, allying themselves with elderly care organizations.

But if you are staying at home alone, then take these necessary steps:

1. Install resorting modern safety and security measures like CCTV or hiring security guards from high-end agencies.
2. Ensure that domestic help/nurse/ayah employed have gone through police verification.
3. A neighbor, friend, or relative must be available on the SOS list.
4. Avoid walking alone or along deserted pathways.
5. Keep the house relatively free of much extra cash or valuables.
6. Ensure helpline numbers are readily available.
7. A duplicate set of keys are available with a trusted and reliable person.
8. Socialize to ensure access with friends and neighbors.
9. Living in a community or else being connected to one will somewhat ensure that one will be missed!!! Or that a cry for help will be answered.

Living alone is a matter of choice for many of the young and for many elderly. It is also a matter of necessity for others but finally, we have to do what is to be done!!